Napkins: A Study in Human Behavior

Folks hate being sticky. Nowadays, with advances in personal hygiene, there are a myriad of ways to avoid getting messy. The most common of all is the napkin. At Capogiro, we go through a lot of 'em. Our deliciously cold gelato has a tendency to begin to melt in room temperature, so patrons who do not wolf theirs down in a frenzied gulp may require a few napkins.

This being said, there is an interesting trend one can observe as a Capogiro barista; napkins and the people who love them. There are a few clear distinct types of napkin users that we see on the daily...

THE DEMOCRATIC NAPKINEERS: These are the folks who like to make sure that everyone else has a chance to get a napkin or two. They take a couple of napkins for themselves then kindly offer a couple to their friend. They care about the sticky-factor of others, and don't want to ever appear greedy. If need be, the Democratic Napkineers might get up mid-gelato-eating session and grab a couple more. Let them, they're lovely people.

THE HORDERS: These folks are worried that there will be an inevitable napkin shortage, and they tend to grab napkins by the handful. When in line, they send nervous glances to other patrons, silently warning them that things will get messy if they get at all sticky. Some even put some extra napkins in their bags, rationing for the End-of-All-Napkins Armageddon. It's OK, Horders, there will be enough napkins for everyone. This is America, a land bountiful with paper products.

THE REBELS: The Rebels don't need no stinkin' napkin. They're tough-as-nails types who, if messiness attacks, laugh it off with a bawdy guffaw. The Rebels leave a trail of tears and gelato in their wake, and they don't give a damn. They air-dry after their annual showers. They survived Thunderdome. They hate puppies. They're non-conformists. They live for danger. They're really sticky.

So good people, wherever you fall on the napkin spectrum, we don't judge you. There is a place for you here with us at Capogiro Gelato. Come get some napkins. We're just giving 'em away.