Wednesday, November 10, 2010

Preludes and Piercings


Loki Gunderson was a dinosaur. A toy stegosaurus to be precise. After being crafted by some lovely Chinese people, he was sent across the ocean with hopes of a bright future. He was purchased from a little shop in Philadelphia a few months later when the kids at Capogiro needed a new plaything. That's when things started to get a bit dodgy..

Loki arrived to his new home with joy. Looking around him, all he could see what sweet treats, yummy gelato, and smiling faces. The sweet aroma of espresso and coffee swirled around him. Everything seemed great with the world, until he was taken into a small, cold back room. Once there, the Capo kids treated him with no mercy.

They first shoved an Exacto blade through the roof of his mouth. Could he have, Loki would've screamed in protest. The soulless kids then pierced him with a ring, attached to which was a shiny silver key. Loki thought the worst was over, until he realized why he had been taken to this new home. Day after day, he would be dragged by customers to the water closet, where he was forced to witness them do unspeakable acts.

One day in November, Loki decided he'd had enough. When the kids were distracted, he took the opportunity to get the attention of a small child and give him his best puppy dog eyes, pleading silently to be rescued from his bondage. The child took the bait, snatched the dinosaur up with sticky, Scuro-covered hands, and marched him out the front door. At last, thought Loki, freedom!!!

He managed to remain unseen for a few blocks, as the child carried him nonchalantly while trotting alongside his mother. When they rounded the corner of 18th and Walnut, however, the child lost all interest in the small dinosaur, as he was distracted by something shiny. The child dropped Loki onto the hard cement, and he and his mother wandered off. A skinny hipster with a chip on his shoulder walked by a few minutes later, and kicked Loki nice and hard, sending him sailing into the park. Hipsters are known to be dinosaur haters.

Loki landed with a thud, and took a second to collect himself. He stared around into the vast forest that lay ahead of him. Filled with trees and benches and bustling with people, Loki thought he had finally found the promised land. That is, until night fell..

NEXT CHAPTER - 'Jurassic Park: Brave New World of Crackheads and Folk Singers'

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