Wednesday, August 8, 2012

3 Life Problems You Can Fix With Gelato
by Tori Styner

PROBLEM:
Your boyfriend dumps you for your best friend since elementary school and admits that he used your whole two-year relationship to get closer to her.  Then your best friend admits she’s been secretly dating him for the past year of your relationship.



SOLUTION?
Dulce de Leche Gelato.  Hey, it’s about half the fat of your standard ice cream, so you better drown your sorrows either in our gelato or in our fat free sorbetto instead of ice cream because let’s face it: he’s not gonna want you and your twenty extra pounds back.  Also, our Dulce de Leche gelato is a VERY good listener.  Your salty tears will mix with it’s caramelly sweetness and make it so good, you’ll forget all about that jerk.  Maybe you’re best friend’s ex bf you’ve always had a thing for will also be drowning his sorrow in gelato ;)

PROBLEM:
Your significant other “hasn’t been in the mood” lately because of stress or other reasons.



SOLUTION?
Cioccolato Scuro Gelato.  Haven’t you ever heard that dark chocolate is an aphrodisiac?  Have you ever met a chocolate darker than our Serious Dark Chocolate aka Cioccolato Scuro??? No you haven’t.  Buy your sweetie a grande and see if that coco will boost her mojo ;)


PROBLEM:
You really pissed somebody off.




SOLUTION:

You: “My Bad, here’s some of the world’s finest gelato, or perhaps a gift card for some of the worlds finest gelato because I was afraid the heat from your anger at me would melt it.”

Person You Got Mad: “It’s all good, this gelato is deliciouso!”


-Tori

No comments:

Post a Comment