An Ode to Dan

This is Dan. Dantheawesome. I am thankful for everyday that this man comes in to work, smirk on his face and some outrageous comment brewing. I think we should all appreciate his amazingness. He is an awesome chef, loves metal, can build a computer, has an awesome smart fiance, and is one of the funniest, sickest individuals I have ever met.

I almost did not hire Dan. He came in for an interview and our kitchen manager at the time met with him. His hair was dyed black black black and I seem to remember that he had black finger nail polish. He swears this is not the case. He does not lie and I have no idea why I think this. His eyes were red and he looked sad. Toby, our manager, swore he was a great guy, very sweet and hired him. Okay, but was he stoned? His eyes were red. I did not have a good feeling.

He started working. He was quiet. He was prompt. He was very capable. His eyes were red. I would sniff around him. Goth is fine, but stoned at work is not. I decided I would confront him. He came into work that morning wearing glasses. His eyes were not red. I asked. He was having problems with his contacts. Wow. I am an ass. Did he act high? No. Was he nothing but professional? Yup. It seems I am just an old fart and so very wrong.

Soon thereafter, Toby went on to become a farmer and Dan stepped into her shoes. Toby was amazing and these were big shoes to fill. Besides, I wanted to have fun while in the kitchen and Dan was up for the task. He breaks the monotony with a leedle, leedle, leedle and taps his feet while he works. He can get a little violent with throwing stuff at people, but you must take the good with the bad.

So this week should be Dan Appreciation Week. I will bestow on him Bomba rice and pizza dough. May his grill always light and burn super hot and may his gamer account never go dark. Thank you Dan. You are the awesomest.